Carnival of Pandemonium

 Whenever I am tricked into watching programmes such as The World’s Most Expensive Yachts, or Rich Pig 2022 or You’ll never be able to afford this if you worked until you were 256 Celebrity Edition, I inevitably come away feeling a bit down.  It can be annoying to have all of the worlds riches stuffed in your face with no chance of ever buying them. Almost like another excuse for the super rich to laugh at us. Well, digressing slightly, but my message is - Eat the Rich, I can’t wait to see what they taste like. However it is easy to come away from these experiences feeling inadequate. This is understandable in our money driven, consumerist society. Digressing again- combat this with minimalism- which again is another story and other blog post.  I see people in both anger and awe when they see the riches of footballers, pop stars and film stars. People gaze at an Aston Martin screeching past in the street, wrestling with the notion that they’re impressed but also know that barring a lot

 Whilst I love toast, especially when it’s drizzled and drenched in butter, waiting for the toaster can be a bind. Here’s a few things to do whilst waiting for your toast to pop up-  Knit a cardigan  Write a novel Grow a beard Run a marathon  Do my food shop Change my car engine  Mow Old Trafford Cricket Ground Drive to London… and back  Rewrite my University dissertation  Build a house (on my own)  Read War and Peace Read the Bible Watch the whole of Breaking Bad Watch Get Back Listen to the whole of the Beatles’ back catalogue Try to unfathom Boris’ thinking and actions Become a doctor Become an architect  Become an accountant  Create an antidote to becoming an accountant  Paint my fence (2 coats) Watch paint dry Watch my grass grow Bake a new loaf for tomorrow’s toast Milk a cow Churn the milk into butter Make an decorate a plate Build a table Sand all of my skirting doors Undercoat my skirting boards Gloss my skirting boards (2 coats)  Redecorate my bedroom Redecorate my kitchen  R

 Today was Sunday. I was meandering my way happily through God’s day of rest, ate a leisurely breakfast, did a tiny bit of housework, was about to wash the car when my daughter reliably informed me that she had a science project to finish for tomorrow.  Mild panic set in but I reassured her that she still had the rest of the day to finish it if she got started now.  No.  It wasn’t a simple case of googling a few science topics and putting it into your own words…  What’s it on?  Animal cells. Shouldn’t be too tough…  You have to make it.  What?  You have to make it!  These words may as well have come from Mars and smashed me in between the eyes in a bolt of blue!  Not a making project. The mother of all fear and panic.  Some furious googling did actually occur, but that was done by my wife and I frantically scouring the web hoping to find an easy project to copy. Er, I meant for inspiration. This was not going to be a walk in the park that was for definite. The only models I found looke

 Maybe this title is a little strong. Maybe it isn't. However, I was listening to the wonderful podcast "Now, where were we?" by Barry and Bob Cryer- which I can heartily recommend by the way- and they were interviewing comedian and writer Sanjeev Bhaskar and happened upon the topic of research. This may sound completely dull and boring- why am I writing about looking facts up? Well, the simple fact (see what I did... they don't call me the master of the pun for nothing you know! Or is it that they don't call me the master of the pun... one or the other) of the matter is that these days, when we wish to find something out, we can simply get out our phones and google it. This has been so engrained within our culture that to google is now a verb and has been for ages. This is all well and good, sure you get to the answer straight away, so what could possibly be the problem? Well, googling answers and searching for facts on Wikipedia is not necessarily bad, it's

 I know this is the most obvious title of a blog post ever, but I believe it needs saying. Having a cold is awful... there you go I said it again. Not only do you feel horrific- I can hardly breathe and my nose is as blocked as a u-bend after a certain character from Austin Powers has done his business, without the smell I hasten to add... see what I did there...- but you have to constantly react to people reliably informing me of the need to 'do a covid test... you know... just in case...'. Dear friend, even though I have done five or six covid tests over the past few days (all negative), I do actually know what a cold feels like having had a multitude of them over the past 37 years of my life. I can can attest that... THIS IS A COLD!  Newsflash- there are actually other illnesses apart from covid! Yes covid has flu like symptoms, yes it feels a bit like a cold... yada yada I get it... but I know a cold when I see one. It is the exact same cold I suffer from every year. Every

 Hi Steven here! Thank you very much for reading my blog when I know there are literally millions of others out there for you to choose from.  So what on earth do you write in a welcome post- maybe a little bit about what the site is about would probably help!  So my aim for this site is to share some of my life as a writer- my family life and my ups and downs- plus I'd love to share some of my actual writing too! If you would like to guest write for my blog then I am all ears, so don't hesistate to reach out. My best place is on Twitter, where you can find me  @thatdadpod Thank you very much Steven